My Mother, Genius

• e-mailed to me
  
  1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
  2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
  3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
  4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why."
  5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
  6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
  7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
  8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
  9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
  10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
  11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
  12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
  13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
  14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"
• 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
  16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."
  17.. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"
  18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
  19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
  20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
  21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
  22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."
  23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
  24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
  25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Friday Fugly

Impeach Senator Harry Reid

The power to set Foreign Policy resides only in the Presidency.

"War in Iraq lost": US Democrat leader

Apr 19 01:50 PM
US/Eastern

The war in Iraq "is lost" and a US troop surge is failing to bring
peace to the country, the leader of the Democratic majority in the US Congress,
Harry Reid, said Thursday.

"I believe ... that this war is lost, and this surge is not accomplishing anything, as is shown by the extreme violence in Iraq this week," Reid said, on the same day US President George W. Bush was giving a speech at an Ohio town hall meeting defending the war on terror.

The right to impeach public officials is secured by the U.S. Constitution in Article I, Sections 2 and 3, which discuss the procedure, and in Article II, Section 4, which indicates the grounds for impeachment: "the President, Vice President, and all civil officers of the United States shall be removed from office on impeachment for, and conviction of, treason, bribery, or other high crimes and misdemeanors."

Possibly, a better form of impeachment might be giving soldier's families, relatives of Iraqi's killed by the terrorists, and those trying to ensure Iraq's future 30 minutes in a locked room with Senator Harry Reid. Alone. No press. Leaving only a video to show to Nancy Pelosi, Schumer, et al.

Michelle Malkin has a better idea.
Never Yet Melted has some thoughts

Also see:
Frontline America
Right Wing Champ
Gateway Pundit
Sweetness & Light
Ridgecrest Blog
Blogical Conclusions has some relevant questions for the Hairy Reed

I Blame the European Press for the Holocaust, Not Charlton Heston

Blame Charlton Heston

In the strongest editorialized image of the day, German cable news
broadcaster NTV flashed an image of the former head of the National Rifle Association, the US gun lobby: In other words, blame rifle-wielding Charlton Heston for the 33 dead.

I also blame the European press, through their refusal to see truths and their pathetic proselytizing to murderous thugs and terrorists world-wide, for some of the worst wholesale slaughters in history. Here's a short list of other things, using their logic of blame, that they are guilty of:

Kosovo
Katyn Forest
The Iron Curtain
Red Brigades
The Irish Republican Army
al-Qaida
The Salafist Group for Call and Combat
The Polisario Front *
Abu Nidal Group
Basque Fatherland and Liberty
Democratic Front for the Liberation of Palestine
Hamas
Hezballah
Palestine Liberation Organization
Baader-Meinhof

and other murdering groups and individuals because the European Press has not only had sympathy with these groups, but have also aided and abetted them in my opinion.

Of course the difference is that Charlton Heston headed up a peaceful group that never set out to harm or murder anyone and neither Heston or the NRA had anything to do with pathetic mass killer, Cho Seung-hi.

But, then, the European Press wouldn't know the truth or the facts if they got bit in the butt by them. They can pick on a man who can't defend himself. How typical. Cowards.

UPDATE: * I am told by Will that the Polisario Front is non-violent for which I thank him for the clarification, but Algeria is still arming the Polisario Front in its fight with Morocco while the UN urges negotiations.

Ohio's Embarrassment

April 17, 2007

Dear Colleague:

This week I intend to introduce Articles of Impeachment with respect to the conduct of Vice President Cheney.

Please have your staff contact my office . . . if you would like to receive a
confidential copy of the document prior to its introduction in the House.

Sincerely,
/s/
Dennis J. Kucinich
Member of Congress

When will the 10th District of Ohio end our state's national embarrassment of having this person in office? He wastes time, money and hope of a sane dialogue by his life long need for attention and recognition through sophistry, nay intellectual immaturity.

One can only hope his actions and his thinking directing them is buffoonery, because the alternative is too frightening to contemplate.

1916 Russia

There's NO Kissing in Kama Sutra!

Indian protesters burn effigies of Richard Gere after public kiss

I'm just guessing here, but maybe the reason that Harlequin never picked up and published the Kama Sutra is there's no kissing.

If I were Shilpa Shetty I would be the one burning effgies and sticking pins in little gerbils to ward off the cooties. Of course, on the bright side, at least it wasn't Rosie O'Donnell doing the huggin and a kissin.

What will be the next riot de jour?

US Taxes for Anti-US Groups

I believe this site is one everyone should read.

Taxpayer-Supported US-Hating 501c3 “Charities”

The craziness has become dangerous in that the once crazy are now effecting our future.

Crazies scare me.

Newspeak Benn Happening

Britain stops using 'war on terror' phrase
Expression makes militants feel too important, minister says

International Development Secretary Hilary Benn, a rising star of the governing Labour Party, says in a speech prepared for delivery in New York that
the expression popularized by President Bush after the Sept. 11 attacks strengthens terrorists by making them feel part of a bigger struggle.

It is obviously ungood to speak of the War on Terror because it may embolden terrorists. To be prolewise would force malreporting.

Hilary will be Hillary, but no sexcrime there.

UPDATE: Protein Wisdom sez;

“The War on Super Meanies”

Michael Moore's Cuban Utopia

Cuban Health Care. Maybe Michael Moore can get treated for his obesity and shysterism for free. Having grown up in a medical family, thus I spent a LOT of time in hospitals, I can just imagine the stench of a Michael Moore in an unairconditioned hospital that has no hygienic regimen.

In my opinion Michael Moore is either a liar, a moron or a morally empty evil boy just making a buck for himself.

I do know he is a pretty sad and weak propagandist with equally pathetic fans.

Virginia Tech

A number of my son's friends attend VT.

We're waiting.

San Francisco Treat

Urban planners are bureaucrats

Which is not a compliment. They usually have a tin eye.

At least the light pole in front of our house is not this inappropriate, but close.

Why is the village planner usually a bureaucrat not a visionary nor a planner?

Another Reason to Leave the Islamofascists Alone

At least according to the anti-freedom Liberals and Progressives. I mean, think about it, Islamofascists don't like us nor our being allowed to think for ourselves.

I think the thought pictured in the photograph perfectly states the Liberal and Progressive thought. Unless you agree with them.

Then you're cool.

2006 Election - Was it really about Iraq?

As Ohio (State) goes, so goes the nation.

Levin, Schumer, Pelosi, Murtha, Reid and even crazy little Kucinich all proclaim the same; the 2006 election was about getting out of Iraq. Election rehashes about corruption, incompetence, and spending occur only when it suits their de jour agenda talking points.

Was the 2006 election decided by Iraq?

I do not think so. The very large number of Republicans across the country that I speak with do not believe that Iraq was the deciding factor.

The 2006 election was decided by Republicans who decided that elected Republicans had involved into corrupt fat cat and big spending Democrats. Thus republicans did not donate what they could have. Republicans did not volunteer, did not network nor did they do the things necessary to win in a media driven Liberal environment.

Republicans did not have the deciding factor — "fire in the gut".

Did Democrats have “fire in the gut” as they went to the polls? No, they did not, at least as a whole. The average Democratic voter wouldn’t vote for a Conservative for a simple reason, they think Conservatives are as crazy as left wing nuts are, but those left wing nuts are their left wing nuts, so they have to accept them.

Republicans lost because voters didn’t see that many Republicans running. They saw self-satisfied DC politicians listed on their ballot.

I know that people will point to exit polls which listed Iraq as #3 in terms of their voting priority, but exit polls are good TV and lousy politics. People will also bring up all the pollsters and their polls; Rasmussen, Finklestein, TeleOpinion, Gallup, Zogby, Mason-Dixon, Harris, Pew, USA, ABC, Washington Post and on and on. Polls are like batty aunts in so many ways, but basically everyone seems to have one.

Now, months later as the Democratic leaders and the media are trying to demean Bush, Levin, Schumer, Pelosi, Murtha, Reid and even crazy little Kucinich all proclaim the same; the 2006 election was about getting out of Iraq and everyone takes their statements at face value, including Republicans, as the truth.

The voters did not vote in the Democrats because of the Iraq war. The Democrats did not win because of Republican corruption, the economy, jobless statistics, nor taxation.

The much vaunted Republican powerhouse lost because not only did their fans not show up, the real Republicans players did not show up.

In short, the Republicans beat themselves. Not Iraq. Nor Florida.

To Quote Howard Dean

Aaaaaarrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh

April 14

2005 - Oregon Supreme Court nullifies nearly 3,000 marriage licenses issued to gay couples a year earlier by Multnomah County because Bush is a homophobe.

2003 - U.S. troops in Baghdad capture Abu Abbas, leader of the Palestinian group that killed an American on the hijacked cruise liner the Achille Lauro in 1985 because Bush is a bloodthirsty killer.

1988 - USS Samuel B. Roberts strikes a mine in the Persian Gulf during Operation Earnest Will. U.S. retaliates against Iran on April 18 with Operation Praying Mantis because Bush didn't plan ahead (as usual).

1986 - In retaliation for the April 5 bombing of the La Belle Discotheque in West Berlin in which two U.S. servicemen were killed, Ronald Reagan orders major bombing raids against Tripoli and Benghazi, in Libya, which kills 60 people because Bush had no plan.

1935 - "Black Sunday", the worst dust storm of the Dust Bowl because Bush didn't pass Kyoto.

1915 - The Turks invade Armenia and I personally blame Bush for every time I left a crumb on my plate and I heard about starving Armenian children.

1912 - The British ocean liner RMS Titanic strikes an iceberg in the North Atlantic on its maiden voyage, plunging beneath the waves and taking with it over 1,500 lives at about 2:20 a.m. the following morning because Bush had no evacuation plan.

1865 - U.S. President Abraham Lincoln is shot in Ford's Theatre by John Wilkes Booth because Bush caused so much hatred in America known as Bush Derangement Syndrome.

1846 - The Donner Party of pioneers departs Springfield, Illinois, for California, on what will become a year-long journey of hardship, cannibalism, and survival because Bush had no plan.

4 Friday Fugly Award

e-mailed to me. I believe this horror is in England.

The Dog Did eat My Homework Mr Leahy!

Just ask my past teachers and professors. They'll tell you.

Leahy: Missing RNC E-mails are like Nixon's 18-minute gap
"Like the famous 18-minute gap in the Nixon White House tapes, it appears
likely that key documentation has been erased or misplaced. This sounds like the
Administration's version of 'the dog ate my homework.'"

Oh, I just love it when Liberals get all hepped over a non-issue such as the judges so they can avoid real issues and get face time to smear Republicans.

You know when spittle starts flying from a Liberal's mouth that Nixon or Hitler are usually spat out as damning condemnation of all they dislike.

Les Moonves wusses out to racist

Al "The Baiter" Sharpton wins one as Moonves wusses totally out.

CBS Radio Fires Don Imus
Moonves had met with Reverends Al Sharpton and Jesse
Jackson on Thursday morning to discuss Imus' future with the company.

If I was a stockholder I'd sure as hell want to know when CBS hired two shakedown artists like Sharpton and Jackson to advise Moonves on employment.