Friday, April 01, 2011

I Love Joe Klein

Really! Who else can ridicule and dismiss that which scares him politically the most?

It is always an education to watch our American writhings from overseas. It is particularly excrutiating watching the Republican Party presidential candidates who, on a daily basis, pronounce some ignorant racist or irreligious twaddle...which--amazingly enough--manages to be heard around the world.
Twaddle! Everyone loves twaddle especially irreligious twaddle as highlighted by such a religious man.

And then there is Herman Cain, the former chief executive of Godfather's Pizza who is pretending to run for President, proving that a black man can be as gutter-cheap bigoted as anyone.

Wait! What happened to the liberal rule that blacks could not be racist? Oh, nuance. Cain isn't racist, he's a bigot. Joe, that really clears it up for us twaddlers. Besides, who wants a black pizza tosser in the White House when we can have a black real world community organizer who won't do those jobs. Or any job that actually does something like creating jobs and meeting payrolls.

And so I plead, as an unflinching American patriot--please Mitch Daniels, please Jeb Bush, please run. I may not agree with you on most things, but I respect you. And you seem to respect yourselves enough not to behave like public clowns.

Please, in the name of Abraham Lincoln and Theodore Roosevelt, run.

Nothing screams patriot like the unflinching Joe. Really. And unflinchingly Joe weeps with love for dead Republican presidents just to show he is a multicultural political animal. He really loves dead Republican presidents if they've been dead for at least 100 years. Those less dead, not so much.

Joe would never try to pull the wool over our eyes with "some bilious nonsense escaping his lizard brain" because Joe is a straight shooter, clear thinker and a card carrying member of Team Time which in and of itself shouts TWADDLE from the spires of religious exactitude down into the canyons of New York City and out across the clown filled pastures of Washington, DC.

I love Joe Klein, but not in that way.