By all reports Ann Coulters appearance at Ottawa U was a complete disaster for all life loving people. Last night's speech was cancelled because hate.
As quiet and respectful protesters wearing shirts emblazoned with "I love those Jew bastards" and "I bomb for love" (and other articles of faith) milled peacefully in front of the Marion Building, Ann Coulter, wearing stiletto heels and a "I HATE" see through T-shirt, was seen running from rooftop to rooftop screaming profanities and dragging a burning effigy of Provost Francois Houle. This display of hateful speech and action caused a fire alarm to go off.
One protester, who led a prayer for Coulter, sighed as she wept for all saying, "Oh, I just wish Ann could see the logic that real free speech is restricted for the good of all children and women of the world." This protester felt the love so strongly that she had left her "Women as patriarchs in a world that sucks" symposium to attend and pray for Ms. Coulter.
Francois Houle, esteemed Provost and protector of free speech and civility, rapidly moved from stricken student to love stricken protester handing out small cups of water and a flower offered with kind words, but with a sad look on his face.
"Provost Houle offered hope at a time of despair. He saved me from becoming a cynic, which is soooo easy in this misbeguided world. Provost Houle is my hero. I only hope he can feel our thanks as we struggle to emulate his fearless stance against hatred in the world," offered one 58 year old student.
The event was thankfully cancelled after panicked students, confused by the screaming and fire of Ms. Coulter and the ensuing fire alarm, ran in the wrong direction blocking the exit doors of the Marion Building. Unaware that hateful supporters of Ms. Coulter were roasting their stomachs in the Hell of the auditorium inferno, blissfully started chanting, "Stop the hate, God loves the Caliphate," in hope of thwarting Ms. Coulter's craven attack upon their senses.
After a glorious evening of witnessing freedom and civility working hand in fist, this reporter sought solace at a local Burkha and Burp for some much needed grape leaves and tea, where I found a small group of students ground into silence. Their faces filled with sadness and hope as they witnessed their beloved, but exhausted police file past this Palestinian refuge of culinary peace. For the moment, their work done, they trudged back to their station.
As I file this report I must constantly remind myself of the bravery of Provost Houle who obviously has had a positive influence on his students and the tireless police. Their work will never end, but that is a story unto itself which I will file at a later date titled, A Student’s Life of Endless Suffering to Fight Intolerance in a World Gone Mad.
For now, as a glorious new day peaks over the eastern horizen, Ottawa U and her students have returned to its normally tranquil state, even as Ms. Coulter slinks back across the border into the waste lands leaving stiletto gashes on our soil.
