With so many things going on in the world and many of the stalwarts of the MSM losing gravitas I offer my services as a cracker jack reporter in the mold of the best the MSM has ever offered. Being a person who thinks outside of the box I have decided that the traditional CV is a cliche, thus I offer something newer than Dan Rather's chaps with matching mudflaps;
Meus Gravis Vita
For years I have not wandered more than a few blocks from my office/home except when that taxi driver got lost. Last year I did try a new dry cleaner, but he spoke a language I could understand which ruined the mystic of dealing with the 3rd world.
In the interest of openness I must also report that I accepted a trip to Scottsdale, AZ for an "annual meeting" last year from my employer. The said trip was fully paid for by my employer utilizing an all-inclusive resort in an attempt to sway my objectivity. On my part I fought back by not attending one meeting, dinner, lunch or breakfast. Not even a breakout session nor wine "get-together". I did empty the mini-bar daily and did increase my take home that month by 12% by submitting the maximum per diem for the entire trip including travel days.
In lieu of the 5 W's, today's reporter must involve creativity in their work whether it is theirs or borrowed. Thus we serve ourselves and the public.
Favorite Book: On The Road Again, Jack Kerouac
Favorite Song: Get on You Bad Motor Scooter and Slide, Montrose
Favorite Movie: Anything Woody Allen likes.
References: Upon request.
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