Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Atheist Holiday

Shamelessly stolen from Tony Phyrillas' site. If you haven't visited, Tony covers more than just PA politics. He covers Conservatism and is darned good at it.

Judge Decries National Holiday for Atheists
In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.


The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared "Case dismissed!"

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, "Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah... yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!"

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, "Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate his own atheists' holiday!"

The lawyer pompously said, "Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?"

The judge said, "Well it comes every year on exactly the same date -- April 1st! Since our calendar sets April 1st as 'April Fools' Day', consider that Psalm 14:1 and Psalm 53 state, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.'

Therefore, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture he is a fool, thus April 1st is his holiday!"

e-mail

A drunk, who smelled of beer sat down, on a bus seat next to a priest.

The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading.

After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, "Tell me, Father, what causes arthritis?"

The priest replied, "My Son, it is caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and a lack of personal hygiene."

The drunk muttered in response, "Well, I'll be darned," and returned to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, put his hand gently on the man's arm and apologized.

"I'm sorry.... I should not have come down on you so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"

"I don't have arthritis, Father," the drunk replied. "I was just reading here that the Pope does."

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Duh of the Day

Clinton Owes Lead in Poll To Support From Women

Gothic Revival


The Death Of Communist USSR

Remarks at the Brandenburg Gate West Berlin, Germany June 12, 1987
General Secretary Gorbachev, if you seek peace, if you seek prosperity for
the Soviet Union and Eastern Europe, if you seek liberalization: Come here to
this gate! Mr. Gorbachev, open this gate! Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this
wall!

Prosperity and freedom has a nice ring to it. Why are so many opposed to Iraq and Afghanistan having some?

Or for that reason, why are so many opposed to having some here in America?

Corzine And The Netherlands

New Jersey was originally named Albania.

That could explain a lot. Like New Jersey being a nether region.

Not The Same As Fish Eyes

If a Lobster loses an eye, it will grow another one.

Rome In A Day

Via Veritas et Venustas

Virtual Rome is coming soon.

This very cool.

Fred Dalton Thompson

Mark at Right Minded nails it.

There isn't ever going to be another Ronald Reagan for the same reason there
will never be another Vince Lombardi, another Mickey Mantle, or another Mother
Teresa. It's 2007 now, and not 1980. It is the responsibility of conservatives,
therefore, to stop looking for the next Ronald Reagan, and start looking for a
candidate in the present who can lead a conservative movement on the national
level. Considering the current lineup of Republican candidates for president,
there isn't one who could answer that calling. But Fred Thompson could.


UPDATE: Dalton? If Congress is the Double Deuce, Fred is the cure.

UPDATE: I was reminded that I wrote about this here.

Today's Episcopal World

Lapsed is to Episcopal

as

Slightly is to pregnant.

Grand Kleagle "Lil" Bobby Byrd

My ninth brief conversation with Senator Robert Byrd’s (D-WV) Grand Kleagle hood

There is good Goldstein. There is great Goldstein.

And, then, there is classic Goldstein.

Insightfully classic.

Oh, and a certain reverence for the irreverent

Monday, June 11, 2007

Roosevelt and Immigration

Since I am on the topic, an e-mail from my mother-in-law in Arizona.
Teddy Roosevelt, 1907

"In the first place, we should insist that if the immigrant who
comes here in good faith becomes an American and assimilates himself to us, he
shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage
to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin.
But this is predicated upon the person's becoming in every facet an American,
and nothing but an American...There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man
who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all.
We have room for but one flag, the American flag... We have room for but one
language here, and that is the English language... and we have room for but one
sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people."


Outside of the Bull Moose Party stupidity, he was outstanding.

What It Means To Be An American

Via Bob's Blog

What it means to be an American.....
...
My father fought along side men whose parents had come straight over
from Germany , Italy , France and Japan . None of these 1st generation Americans ever gave any thought about what country their parents had come from. They were Americans fighting Hitler, Mussolini and the Emperor of Japan They were
defending the United States of America as one people.

...

My wife's father, whose parent's were Italian, served. My Father's family was from Wales and served, learning English as soldiers and teaching their families when they returned home.

According to my Aunts, my mother's family taught English to God, though I think that may be a stretch.

Bush Screws The Pooch, Again

States Finding Fiscal Surprise: A Cash Surplus

Budget surpluses have largely stemmed from higher than expected tax
collections — corporate tax revenues alone were 11 percent higher than budget
estimates — and booming local economies. There has also been some relief in
Medicaid spending, which fell from an 11 percent annual growth rate to something closer to 7 percent in the past few years.



My word, how can we stop this man before he strikes again?

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Birds & The Bees, Sherrod Brown Has A New Honey

Sen. Brown, legislators look to protect Ohio's bees

''The bee population in Ohio is declining at an alarming rate and
Ohio's fruit and vegetable farmers are at risk,'' Brown said in a statement.
''This bill would support Ohio's farmers by protecting the bee population they
rely on to pollinate their crops.''


Uh, that may not be the case. The well known Honey Bees were immigrants as well as us. They came from Europe.

Many of the real experts, Honey Bee keepers are skeptical:
Many beekeepers are skeptical of the reports or at least how they're adding
up. For 100 years, beekeepers have logged periodic reports of sudden and
inexplicable bee die-offs.

People refer the latest die-off by its initials "CCD," but one Georgia
beekeeper instead calls it the "SSDD" crisis for "Same Stuff, Different Day."

"People have lost bees from the beginning of time," Sowers said.


Also, Honey Bees do not pollinate corn, wheat, rice, rye, barley, and all the other grain crops as Scare-ed Brown and others imply.

Nice try.

HT to Right Angle

UPDATE: I love this line in my swamped comment section.
The new brown shirts are green. Cheers - Dinah

FUGLY: The Moonies Will Hate Us



California Eco Homes Double As Moon Units

Nader Khalili's affordable and eco-friendly ceramic, domed homes could
one day house the first settlers on the Moon.



Will they call it Turtle Bay?

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Immigration Bill Dead As A Dodo?

Don't believe it. At least not until you see a stake through its black little heart.

Another good sign might be Teddy Kennedy being allowed to take scotch breaks from his work building the wall. Weather near the Rio Grande can get stuffy in July.

To Whining Republicans Everywhere

I am not in Ohio. I am on the east coast for a few days doing political work. I have closed my company to do this.

We may win again in 2008. We may not.

To Peggy Noonan, the wimps debating in the "republican" dog and pony shows on TV and the pundits and "professionals" spewing their poison about Bush, a pox on you.

I am a not too old fool who believes. I fought the fight, in a small way, back when Reagan was organizing, and pissed off a bunch of Liberals, to become President.

Not one world will be shaken by my full time return to politics.

It will make me feel better because the whining by republicans about Bush and the whining by Liberals about Bush makes me sick.

The 11nth Commandment.

A movement was and is built by like minded individuals, not by a herd of of self serving whiners expecting people to listen to their individual bitching.

As a Republican and a Conservative, to me, you sound like little whinny Liberals desperately seeking attention.

How sad you have sunk so low.

Maybe in your "down" time you could sign up to be a poll watcher, a door-to-door worker, a phoner, a researcher, a treasurer, a manager, a "kitchen cabinet" advisor, a LTTE writer, a press person, a volunteer, a volunteer coordinator, a precinct captain, a spokesman, a committe member, a fund raiser, a sign placer, an office volunteer, a weekend phone answerer or maybe you can continue to pontificate.

Blogging is good, but blogging is benign in the heat of battle, unless you are a star.

Does Bush piss you off? Maybe Hillary will make you feel better or your blog more profitable.

Step up to the plate, at least in some small way, or STFU.

You may not shake the world, but you might make that bed of your's a bit more comfortable.

You know, to sleep in. Well.

Rant off.

He Of Cat Scratch Fever Voice and The Crying Man

Drudge:

IMMIGRATION BILL ON THE BRINK OF COLLAPSE IN SENATE... DEVELOPING...

Good. If Voinovich votes for this, I'll not send him another box of Mr Pipp and Moon Pies. I'll send them to Sherrod Brown so his cholesterial does him in.

It's a toss up.

Big Stink Worsens Dirty Butt Syndrome

THE BIG STINK: LA RESIDENTS TOLD TO CUT SHOWERS AS DROUGHT DEEPENS

Sheryl Crow has not returned repeated phone requests for comment. Icky phone and one square suspected.